Whether you have been having trouble conceiving, are in a same-sex partnership, or don’t want to experience pregnancy on your own, utilizing a surrogate can be a great solution. While many individuals turn to surrogacy agencies to find a suitable carrier, having a sibling serve as a surrogate parent may also come to mind. 

Choosing a sibling as your surrogate may seem natural, but it can present unique challenges. This article delves into the intriguing question of whether a sibling can be a surrogate and explores the financial realities, familial complications, and important factors that siblings should consider before embarking on this unique surrogacy journey. 

Can Your Sibling Be a Surrogate? 

The decision to pursue surrogate parenting is a vulnerable one, and you may feel more comfortable if your sibling is the one going on the journey with you. While having a sibling carry a child for you may seem appealing, it is essential to carefully evaluate their physical and emotional readiness to undertake this significant responsibility.

Surrogacy agencies have thorough vetting processes to ensure the surrogate mother is mentally and physically able to take on pregnancy. Ask your surrogacy agency to screen your sibling like any other surrogate mother to minimize risk and potential heartbreak. You want to trust your sibling, of course, but doing your due diligence ahead of conception will ensure that the journey is smooth sailing for all involved. 

You and your spouse also must decide ahead of time whether your sibling will be donating their DNA or if they will be carrying pre-fertilized embryos. This decision is deeply personal and should be discussed with your spouse, doctor, and fertility team. 

Financial Realities of Having A Family Member as a Surrogate Parent 

Even when a sibling is your surrogate, surrogacy can be hugely expensive. As the intended parents, you are responsible for paying for all medical expenses incurred during the surrogacy: medical screenings, IVF, implantation, prenatal vitamins, OBGYN appointments, potential complications, the birth itself, and postpartum care. In addition, you may choose to compensate your sibling on top of covering medical costs – as long as you are in a state where it is legal to do so. 

It’s crucial that you, your partner, and your sibling must draw clear expectations about your respective financial responsibilities throughout the pregnancy. Consult with an attorney specializing in surrogacy law to ensure all parties are fairly represented throughout your journey. 

Familial Complications From Having a Sibling Being Your Surrogate Parent 

The dynamics between siblings can be complex, and introducing surrogacy into the mix can sometimes strain relationships. Before beginning your surrogacy journey, create an open and honest dialogue with your sibling about your expectations and desires. You need to be transparent with your sibling and feel comfortable having hard conversations with them before trusting them to carry your child. 

Make sure that expectations are clear and written down to avoid disagreements or hurt feelings down the road. Talk at length with your sibling about their expectations for prenatal care, postpartum care, and the outcome if the pregnancy is unsuccessful. 

Experts at your chosen surrogacy agency can help guide you through these difficult conversations. Don’t hesitate to ask for guidance and advice before having tough talks with your sibling. 

What Siblings Should Consider Before Becoming Surrogates

Your sibling should also reflect internally to determine if they are ready to be a surrogate. In addition to the physical toll a pregnancy can take on a person, birthing a child and not being there to raise it may be emotionally challenging. Of course, this is mitigated somewhat by the fact that the child they carry will stay in the family; but for some siblings, this may make it more complicated. 

Furthermore, siblings should consider the long-term effects on their family and personal goals. Becoming a surrogate parent may require significant time and energy, which can impact other aspects of life, including personal relationships, career, and other family responsibilities. 

Encourage your sibling to assess their ability to handle these changes and talk openly with you or other trusted loved ones before becoming a surrogate. Also, encourage your sibling to voice their needs and desires from this process, and allow them to consider how much involvement they would like to have in the child’s life after birth. 

Why Utilizing an Agency Can Help With The Complications of Surrogacy 

Being able to lean on a trustworthy surrogacy agency makes the journey much more straightforward. Agencies can provide invaluable support and guidance throughout the entire process, helping you navigate surrogacy’s legal, financial, and emotional aspects. Having experts in your corner can make a tumultuous journey to parenthood much smoother. 

An agency becomes especially vital when you want your sibling to be your surrogate. Working with an agency can help establish clear boundaries, ensure proper legal agreements are in place, and provide professional counseling services to address any familial complications that may arise. 


Deciding to have a sibling as a surrogate parent is a deeply personal choice that requires careful consideration. While it may present financial advantages and a unique familial bond, evaluating the potential challenges and seeking professional guidance is essential. Consulting with doctors, agencies, and other fertility professionals is crucial to ensure that all parties involved are well-informed and prepared for the surrogacy journey. 

At Babies Made With Love, we pride ourselves on the ability to provide you with an exceptional network of medical experts, legal professionals, and experienced counselors who will ensure your physical, emotional, and psychological well-being throughout the process. Our team will be with you every step of the way, offering unwavering support and personalized care as you navigate the complexities of surrogacy. If you’re ready to begin your surrogacy journey, or have any questions about our services, contact us here.